Our reporter, Blue, gained unprecedented access to the Chief Justice, who agreed to discuss his personal health, beauty, and relaxation habits.
The oldest Pokémon on the Supreme Court, Chief Justice Pikachu has always amazed the public with his seemingly perfect health. As we sit at his charming kitchen table, the Justice is now ready to share his secret.
“Pik pika chu…pika pika!” He laughs devilishly as he refills my glass of ketchup. “How do you think I stay so healthy?”
“Believing in yourself, no matter what challenges you face?” I guess, feeling silly.
Pikachu takes another bite of apple, “Nope, that’s not it! You won’t believe it, but the secret is clean feet.”
Clean feet? He must be joking.
“Pika pika,” Pikachu says, lifting one yellow foot and revealing its sole. His feet are surprisingly petite, and yes, they are indeed very clean.
“Pikachu pik chu,” He says, waggling his yellow toes, “Our feet are the foundation of our bodies, in which our souls reside. You wouldn’t build a house on an unstable foundation and expect it to remain standing, would you? So, if we want good health and longevity, our foundation must be clean and healthful.”
Chief Justice Pikachu says that he’s been practicing foot hygiene his entire life, and looking at archival photos, this appears to be true.
In this photo, a young Pikachu laughs in merriment after his departure from his childhood home of Pallet Town. His feet are an unblemished yellow.
After a long walk through the Viridian Forest, Pikachu’s feet somehow remain sparkling clean.
Pictured here, Pikachu shares a picnic lunch with his foster son, Togepi. His feet look very clean, and it appears that he instilled this value in his progeny.
An older Pikachu proudly displays the vibrant sole of his foot during an evolution ceremony.
Are his feet clean here? We don’t know, but we would assume so.