Standing before a crowd of cheering Pokémon at Cerulean City Hall, Congressman Blastoise declares his intent to run for president.
“Blastoise toise blast blast blastoise!” He shouts, pumping his fist in the air.
“It’s been ages since a member of the Blue Party was president,” a local Staryu tells our reporter, “so it’s exciting to have a strong candidate like Blastoise.”
“In 2020, it’s Blastoise or bust!” roars a group of Squirtles. The crowd of Pokémon surrounding City Hall erupts into a chant of “Blastoise or bust!”
Blastoise chuckles amiably in response. “I appreciate your support. In 2020, let’s start a blue wave!” The audience cheers and shoots celebratory spouts of water.
Blastoise centers his campaign on the following five points:
Strong Defense Policies
During his time as a Wartortle, Blastoise served in the Kanto region navy. “Toise blast toise blastoise,” he says, “I have first-hand knowledge of how a strong defense improves quality of life for all Kanto Pokémon.”
Working Across the Aisle to Get Things Done
As a congressman, Blastoise has a track record of working with members of other parties to pass meaningful legislation. The image below is from when he and Congresswoman Venusaur championed a bill to lower prices of Super and Hyper Potions.
Family Values
Blastoise often spends his weekends volunteering with children at his local Pokémon Center. “Blastoise,” he declares, “It goes without saying that children literally are the future.”
Women’s Rights
“There is an ancient saying 'blastoise toise blast blast blastoise toise blastoise, women are the strength of the turtle shell.' ” Blastoise recites to the crowd. As a congressman, Blastoise has championed bills to protect and promote women’s rights.
Blastoise’s wife, pictured with him in the image below, is an Admiral. Per Blastoise, “She’s brilliant, powerful, and totally out of my league!”
Pro-Healthcare
“Training at the gym and receiving care at Pokémon Centers is an important part of life in the Kanto region. No Pokémon should worry about being turned away from a gym due to not having connections with more powerful Pokémon. No Pokémon should have to worry about how they’re going to pay for a Potion. Toise blast toise!”
